The world looks around me as I struggle along
They say I have nothing, but they are so wrong.
In my heart I'm rejoicing, how I wish they could see
Thank You, Lord, for Your blessings on me.
There's a roof up above me, I've a good place to sleep.
There's food on my table, and shoes on my feet.
You gave me Your love, Lord, and a fine family.
Thank you, Lord, for Your blessings on me.
I know I'm not wealthy and these clothes are not new,
I don't have much money, but Lord, I have You,
And to me
You're all that matters tho' the world may not see.
Thank you, Lord, for Your blessings on me.
My Granny had this song handwritten in a little spiral notebook with many of her other favorite songs to sing. She taught it to me and I remember the tune from childhood - I guess she really was the one who taught me to be thankful for things, and to respect my elders and try to watch out for and take care of other people.
I've heard this song a couple of times since then. It was played on the organ at her funeral, and it was a song that my Dad picked out for the youth choir to sing not too long ago in church. I don't even know if he knew that was a song she had taught me, but it was bittersweet to hear the little kids singing it like I sang it with her in her house years ago.
Last week I was baptized, and I looked out from the front of the church out onto many of my family and friends. It hit me how lucky I am to have such a wonderful family - it has gradually dawned on me in the past few years, and very much so lately.
I focused for a long time on how much I regretted not being here for so many years, and not spending enough time with my Granny before she passed away. For the last few years of her life I spent more time thinking about how I really needed to get home to see her, than I actually spent with her. It was too late when I actually did move home to spend time with my family, and I got caught up in regretting that for a long time once I moved back.
A month or so ago, my Papa got up and sang a song at church, even though he said he hadn't been feeling like he'd be able. Tears streamed down my face as I looked up there and listened to him sing - and saw the joy he had to be up there singing and praising God.
I looked up and thought - I'm a part of this, and he's a part of me.
The past two Fridays I drove over to see Grandma and Papa and stayed for about three hours. Just sitting and talking. No television noise in the background, no distractions. We talked about his doctor visits, we talked about church, and he talked to me about my theology classes. I love to hear him discuss the Bible because he has read and studied the history behind he Bible and numerous commentaries - and even at his age he remembers it all. It's amazing how much knowledge he has about the Bible - and how much he enjoys sharing it. These past two Friday nights have been such a blessing to me, and I left smiling and feeling loved and loving their company.
For almost 27 years now, I've had this wonderful family and plenty of time to enjoy it - and I was always distracted and not spending enough time where I should have been.
It's funny how simple happiness is when we get the distractions out of the way.
Thank you Lord for letting me appreciate the present this time, rather than looking back at the past with regret. Help me continue to do so.
Friday, November 17, 2006
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Outside the box...
I have three thoughts I've jotted down today that I wanted to put on here, however haphazard it may end up:
1. Don't compartmentalize God
2. Quote from Spurgeon about what we take in and think about
3. Don't just long for situations to change
Now I will attempt to put them all together into a somewhat coherent thought.
A quote Pastor Mike shared in a recent Wednesday night sermon I listened to in my car this morning on the way to work:
A person cannot expect to entertain Jesus in the parlor of their hearts with Satan in the cellar. -Charles Spurgeon.
What we allow into our minds day in and day out affects what comes into our heart and out of our mouths during reaction time. I'd heard this before, but lately... it actually means something to me. Surrounding and submersing myself - reading, studying, hearing, playing, and listening - it makes a difference in the thoughts I have throughout the day.
His message dealt with stability - and how stability can only come when we rejoice in the Lord throughout the day - constantly. Only then can we rejoice in Him when the bad times come - instead of asking "why" and "how will I get through this".
We so often only pray when bad things are happening - instead of having an ongoing communication with Him. Continuous conversation - waking up with thanks, asking Him to be with us throughout the day, starting the car and asking Him to help us safely get to work, asking for patience with people throughout the day - asking for constant daily guidance.
Don't compartmentalize God. I know that I do this. Before I got back into church and experienced the changes I had, I wanted everyone around me to compartmentalize God as well. Like he said in the sermon - we try to put God in allotted times - Sunday morning, then maybe Sunday night, maybe even Wednesday night - and maybe even before a meal. Even then, usually not before a meal in a restaurant, or a meal in the breakroom at work.
If we really and truly believe what we say - that God is everywhere all the time - why do we try to only "pay attention" or "talk" to Him at those allotted times?
He is everything - and if we truly believe that we are His creation, created for His glory... then shouldn't every minute be devoted to Him in at least some way?
I have been trying to work on this... waking up before the alarm goes off in the morning, and thanking God upon waking for another day (and for not having to hear that alarm clock).
I am not a cheerful morning person, but as I progress in the stages of waking in the shower, and while getting ready for work - I try to continue my constant dialogue with God:
Give me patience today Lord to deal with the things that will come at me
Give me the strength and courage to share you more with others throughout the day
Keep us all safe on our way to work this morning
I read my daily devotional that Aunt Shirley let me borrow. I tend to rush in the mornings, because the sooner I get in the sooner I get out of work, but I've made myself take the time to read the daily passage in the morning before I leave.
As I get in the car I pray for help with my tendency toward road rage - anger does no one any good, and I experience a lot of impatience when behind the wheel of a car.
I've been listening to some of the Wednesday night sermons this week that I've been missing since I work with the kids on Wednesday nights - and one sermon is usually just enough time for me to pull out of the driveway at home, and into the parking lot at work.
Those give me things to think on while I'm at work. Instead of being frustrated when I'm feeling unmotivated, I try to get into more of a meditative mode and think on the things I've read and heard. Through the day I try to keep up that dialogue.
It's hard to feel alone at any part of the day when you've been constantly talking to God. It's hard to feel like everything is going wrong when you really have faith that He is in control, and that His way and will are best even when our finite human minds can't understand the present. The idea of Providence can really give peace of mind.
We often want to pray for situations to change - we often get frustrated when things don't go our way. I know I do - that's something I've been trying really hard to work on for a while now. Maybe we should instead just pray for a change in our ability to handle those situations, or to change our ability to understand and deal with those situations, and for the ability to hand it all over and trust God.
So many phrases we just say all the time and really lose the meaning of the words.
Trust.
Pronunciation: 'tr&st
Function: noun
1. assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something
2. dependence on something future or contingent
3. a charge or duty imposed in faith or confidence or as a condition of some relationship
4. something committed or entrusted to one to be used or cared for in the interest of another
You have to have faith that someone is competent of taking care of you in order to trust. Why is it so hard for us to relinquish control to an eternal, all powerful righteous God. Do we really trust ourselves with the problems more?
Faith is what it is all about... our worries, our frustrations, our disappointments.
If we truly have faith, those things can slowly melt away, but for some reason it is very hard for us to give up the negative feelings we think we want to get away from.
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5
1. Don't compartmentalize God
2. Quote from Spurgeon about what we take in and think about
3. Don't just long for situations to change
Now I will attempt to put them all together into a somewhat coherent thought.
A quote Pastor Mike shared in a recent Wednesday night sermon I listened to in my car this morning on the way to work:
A person cannot expect to entertain Jesus in the parlor of their hearts with Satan in the cellar. -Charles Spurgeon.
What we allow into our minds day in and day out affects what comes into our heart and out of our mouths during reaction time. I'd heard this before, but lately... it actually means something to me. Surrounding and submersing myself - reading, studying, hearing, playing, and listening - it makes a difference in the thoughts I have throughout the day.
His message dealt with stability - and how stability can only come when we rejoice in the Lord throughout the day - constantly. Only then can we rejoice in Him when the bad times come - instead of asking "why" and "how will I get through this".
We so often only pray when bad things are happening - instead of having an ongoing communication with Him. Continuous conversation - waking up with thanks, asking Him to be with us throughout the day, starting the car and asking Him to help us safely get to work, asking for patience with people throughout the day - asking for constant daily guidance.
Don't compartmentalize God. I know that I do this. Before I got back into church and experienced the changes I had, I wanted everyone around me to compartmentalize God as well. Like he said in the sermon - we try to put God in allotted times - Sunday morning, then maybe Sunday night, maybe even Wednesday night - and maybe even before a meal. Even then, usually not before a meal in a restaurant, or a meal in the breakroom at work.
If we really and truly believe what we say - that God is everywhere all the time - why do we try to only "pay attention" or "talk" to Him at those allotted times?
He is everything - and if we truly believe that we are His creation, created for His glory... then shouldn't every minute be devoted to Him in at least some way?
I have been trying to work on this... waking up before the alarm goes off in the morning, and thanking God upon waking for another day (and for not having to hear that alarm clock).
I am not a cheerful morning person, but as I progress in the stages of waking in the shower, and while getting ready for work - I try to continue my constant dialogue with God:
Give me patience today Lord to deal with the things that will come at me
Give me the strength and courage to share you more with others throughout the day
Keep us all safe on our way to work this morning
I read my daily devotional that Aunt Shirley let me borrow. I tend to rush in the mornings, because the sooner I get in the sooner I get out of work, but I've made myself take the time to read the daily passage in the morning before I leave.
As I get in the car I pray for help with my tendency toward road rage - anger does no one any good, and I experience a lot of impatience when behind the wheel of a car.
I've been listening to some of the Wednesday night sermons this week that I've been missing since I work with the kids on Wednesday nights - and one sermon is usually just enough time for me to pull out of the driveway at home, and into the parking lot at work.
Those give me things to think on while I'm at work. Instead of being frustrated when I'm feeling unmotivated, I try to get into more of a meditative mode and think on the things I've read and heard. Through the day I try to keep up that dialogue.
It's hard to feel alone at any part of the day when you've been constantly talking to God. It's hard to feel like everything is going wrong when you really have faith that He is in control, and that His way and will are best even when our finite human minds can't understand the present. The idea of Providence can really give peace of mind.
We often want to pray for situations to change - we often get frustrated when things don't go our way. I know I do - that's something I've been trying really hard to work on for a while now. Maybe we should instead just pray for a change in our ability to handle those situations, or to change our ability to understand and deal with those situations, and for the ability to hand it all over and trust God.
So many phrases we just say all the time and really lose the meaning of the words.
Trust.
Pronunciation: 'tr&st
Function: noun
1. assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something
2. dependence on something future or contingent
3. a charge or duty imposed in faith or confidence or as a condition of some relationship
4. something committed or entrusted to one to be used or cared for in the interest of another
You have to have faith that someone is competent of taking care of you in order to trust. Why is it so hard for us to relinquish control to an eternal, all powerful righteous God. Do we really trust ourselves with the problems more?
Faith is what it is all about... our worries, our frustrations, our disappointments.
If we truly have faith, those things can slowly melt away, but for some reason it is very hard for us to give up the negative feelings we think we want to get away from.
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5
Sunday, November 12, 2006
To identify
G911
βάπτω - baptō - bap'-to
A primary verb; to whelm, that is, cover wholly with a fluid
G907 "baptize"
βαπτίζω - baptizō - bap-tid'-zo
From a derivative of G911; to make whelmed (that is, fully wet); used only (in the New Testament) of ceremonial ablution, especially (technically) of the ordinance of Christian baptism: - baptist,
Romans Chapter 6
1 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?
2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?
3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death?
4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.
5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection:
6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
7 For he that is dead is freed from sin.
8 Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him:
1. Through baptism we identify with Christ, as it is a symbol of the death, burial, and resurrection
2. Jesus Christ himself asked to be baptized by John the Baptist, to show his identification with the sign of repentance - though he had no sins to repent of.
3. Baptism is a means of publicly announcing that we identify with Christ, and that we are turning away from our old selves and toward Christ
I raised my hand at the age of seven in a small old broken down house that my grandmother and a few others had started a church in. Almost 20 years ago, I raised my hand with eyes closed when he asked if there was anyone there who hadn't given their heart to Jesus and asked him to save their soul. I do believe that moment was important in my life, I do believe that being raised with my grandparents and family who were so religious played a large part in my always believing in God. But I have learned over the past year, that believing in and having true faith in God and His son are very different things. There is believing in your head, and then there is believing in your heart - and the latter creates change.
I believe I was saved a long time ago - God has saved me from myself many times. But I think there is a danger in the simplicity of the invitationals at the end of sermons - I believe there is a danger in growing up believing that you always believed in God that gets you to heaven and lets you escape from Hell. I think that it makes it too easy to escape true salvation - makes it too easy to miss the gift of true repentance, which results in real changes in your heart and mind and life. I was confused the first time I went back to church for the first time, shortly after I moved back home. The music and the sermon - everything just spoke to me that day, and at the end of the sermon I walked up to the altar and cried. At the end of the service, Pastor Mike walked up to me and said, "Did you get saved today?" I left the church feeling overwhelmed and confused - I'd been saved since I was seven... so what happened that day?
I got caught up in confusion and distractions, and didn't go back to church for almost a year. Some things changed in my life and all of a sudden I felt like I was at the lowest point I could possibly reach - I had set the wrong priorities in my life and couldn't seem to shake a constant feeling of disappointment, anger, and bitterness toward life in general. I finally got myself back in church, and over the past year God has used Pastor Mike and everyone around me to teach me where I was and was not for the past 20 years.
I'm glad He has given me something I can feel. I'm glad he's made changes that I never thought were possible, seem much easier when I'm not trying to be in control. I'm glad He gave me the chance to publicly and privately identify with Him. I'm glad I got baptized today. It has felt like something I should do for a while, and I just had a feeling of peace and - identification with the Savior today.
Pastor Mike said the other night in theology class that he thinks the number one thing that we as Christians are supposed to do is to enjoy God and the things He gave us. Above witnessing, worship, and everything else. We all sat there because on our list we had almost all put that last - because we felt that was one of the more selfish things on the list. We put worship, and helping others, and all the others as more important.
But he explained - if we don't enjoy God, we won't do any of those other things for His glory. And any other reason is not the right one, and makes it works for works only.
I'm glad He's teaching me to enjoy Him.
βάπτω - baptō - bap'-to
A primary verb; to whelm, that is, cover wholly with a fluid
G907 "baptize"
βαπτίζω - baptizō - bap-tid'-zo
From a derivative of G911; to make whelmed (that is, fully wet); used only (in the New Testament) of ceremonial ablution, especially (technically) of the ordinance of Christian baptism: - baptist,
Romans Chapter 6
1 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?
2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?
3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death?
4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.
5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection:
6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
7 For he that is dead is freed from sin.
8 Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him:
1. Through baptism we identify with Christ, as it is a symbol of the death, burial, and resurrection
2. Jesus Christ himself asked to be baptized by John the Baptist, to show his identification with the sign of repentance - though he had no sins to repent of.
3. Baptism is a means of publicly announcing that we identify with Christ, and that we are turning away from our old selves and toward Christ
I raised my hand at the age of seven in a small old broken down house that my grandmother and a few others had started a church in. Almost 20 years ago, I raised my hand with eyes closed when he asked if there was anyone there who hadn't given their heart to Jesus and asked him to save their soul. I do believe that moment was important in my life, I do believe that being raised with my grandparents and family who were so religious played a large part in my always believing in God. But I have learned over the past year, that believing in and having true faith in God and His son are very different things. There is believing in your head, and then there is believing in your heart - and the latter creates change.
I believe I was saved a long time ago - God has saved me from myself many times. But I think there is a danger in the simplicity of the invitationals at the end of sermons - I believe there is a danger in growing up believing that you always believed in God that gets you to heaven and lets you escape from Hell. I think that it makes it too easy to escape true salvation - makes it too easy to miss the gift of true repentance, which results in real changes in your heart and mind and life. I was confused the first time I went back to church for the first time, shortly after I moved back home. The music and the sermon - everything just spoke to me that day, and at the end of the sermon I walked up to the altar and cried. At the end of the service, Pastor Mike walked up to me and said, "Did you get saved today?" I left the church feeling overwhelmed and confused - I'd been saved since I was seven... so what happened that day?
I got caught up in confusion and distractions, and didn't go back to church for almost a year. Some things changed in my life and all of a sudden I felt like I was at the lowest point I could possibly reach - I had set the wrong priorities in my life and couldn't seem to shake a constant feeling of disappointment, anger, and bitterness toward life in general. I finally got myself back in church, and over the past year God has used Pastor Mike and everyone around me to teach me where I was and was not for the past 20 years.
I'm glad He has given me something I can feel. I'm glad he's made changes that I never thought were possible, seem much easier when I'm not trying to be in control. I'm glad He gave me the chance to publicly and privately identify with Him. I'm glad I got baptized today. It has felt like something I should do for a while, and I just had a feeling of peace and - identification with the Savior today.
Pastor Mike said the other night in theology class that he thinks the number one thing that we as Christians are supposed to do is to enjoy God and the things He gave us. Above witnessing, worship, and everything else. We all sat there because on our list we had almost all put that last - because we felt that was one of the more selfish things on the list. We put worship, and helping others, and all the others as more important.
But he explained - if we don't enjoy God, we won't do any of those other things for His glory. And any other reason is not the right one, and makes it works for works only.
I'm glad He's teaching me to enjoy Him.
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